BEST WAY TO CLEAN A CERAMIC TILE FLOOR

118/365

Today I cleaned the windows in the duplex and I am sooooo cheesed! It looks great!

I also moved around Tony's herb garden because some were over-taking others and I didn't want them to die.

I also cleaned dog hair nastiness, swept and FINALLY put away the HUGE exercise ball I couldn't (until today) get myself to take the air out of. Truthfully I won't EVER be able to use it in this tiny house, at least not with the amount of stuff we have in it. So it's put up for now.

Lol, then I gave both the dogs a damned bath and now Fred is shedding all over the house. So I gotta take him outside and brush him, but he's gonna just roll in the dirt when I'm done.

*sigh*

I love this little home and I think it's my favorite ever. I know we won't be here too long and that's sad in a way but it's the perfect transition home for us. I hope to always have fond memories.


SLIGHT RANT

In the last few months I have heard friend after friend complaining. It seems to be the theme of people I love and care about (and even two blogs I read!). I hear people whining about their damned problems but then when a solution presents itself they do NOTHING about it.

'Be the change you wish to see in the world' does not always mean recycle, love thy neighbor, give to charity.

It doesn't always mean what you can do for others.

I believe it also means that you can be an inspiration to others in what you do with yourself FOR yourself.

I think it also means to reach your goals, strive to be the best you can be (yes, that means COMPETE!) and love the moments you live just for you.

I am not against giving to others. I am not against volunteering and being a little selfless at times. But do it in a way that you too can appreciate.

Live your life for you and live it well and take some goddamned chances. Too many people live their lives and just let the days pass. They want sympathy from others because they think their lives suck. They wanna hear 'oh, don't worry, it'll get better, you deserve so much more'.

Maybe it won't get better and maybe you DON'T deserve more!!

If you are not willing to work/fight for what you want, if you aren't ready to take risks then perhaps you DON'T deserve the world at your fingertips.

Damn it all, this sense of ENTITLEMENT people have... Where do they GET this? Hey, I'm going to eat like a pig, but I want to look like Paris Hilton. Hey, I'm gonna sit on my lazy ass all day, but I want to be an entrepreneur. Hey, I'm going to sit at my computer and look at Flickr and WoW all day but I want to be a killer writer.

GET OVER THE FUCKING WISHES!!! DO SOMETHING WITH YOUR LIVES!!!

Don't you get how precious time is?!? Don't YOU?! Do you remember five years ago like it was yesterday? I remember TEN years ago like I woke up from it.

To wish for something is to accept it can never be done by your own self.

Take the risk. Shut the f*ck up and do something about what you don't like.

But I'm the bad guy for saying something, right? Because people like to be sheep.

Argh. I just hate to see people with more creative ideas then others will ever have and they're wasting away on STUPID hang-ups. Like some dumb, bimbo future ex-wife, for example.

ARGH!

/SLIGHT RANT.


(sorry, went off there)

288/365
March 11, 2010
My heart has felt nothing but grief since I got to this dumpy place. I'm reminded again and again why I left here. And yet I feel like a bad person for hating this place so much. I know I should be grateful that I have a family...but it's so dysfunctional it should be illegal to spend more than 10 minutes with us at a time.

I try to separate myself from my family mentally...but I get so scared that I'm just another loon. I can't tell you how scared I am of developing paranoid schizophrenia or bipolar disorder...

I just don't know anymore...I'm only 19 and have lost most of my hope. I know I have an entire life ahead of me and I know this won't last forever...but there are times where I am convinced it's all one big prank on me and life really is this bad forever.

But I am a believer in self control...I think I lost that at some point. I just feel so defeated by life sometimes I forget I'm in control of my own destiny.

I think I need to take a trip to the graveyard today...that place always sobers me when my emotions get the best of me. Perhaps I'll go tomorrow and take some pictures?

I'm actually happy with this one despite my original intentions turning into an epic fail. I took this sitting in a full tub with my prom dress on. I've been wanting to do that for quite some time...but the tub is too small and shallow and it's a horrible aqua color. I can't tell you how disappointed I was...and still am. Maybe one day...

TRF: I went to the dentist today and was scared. I inherited my mom's BAD teeth (you name it, I've probably had it done). Despite my brushing I can never manage to escape those pesky cavities! Today I triumphed...save for my gums. They bled and hurt SO bad...they're still a bit achy but I plan to floss every day now...why can't teeth me self cleaning?